


you can be all of you when you're with me (and i'll do the same when i'm with you)

by SilverMoonSky



Series: Marichat May 2020 [6]
Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Mari and Adrien are friends but aren't too close, Marichat May 2020, Some Fluff, Some angst, but of course they don't know each other's identities, but still sweet nonetheless, in which Mari and Chat are dating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2020-05-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,080
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24067990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverMoonSky/pseuds/SilverMoonSky
Summary: Chat and Marinette are dating, but when Chat admits to Ladybug that there are parts of him he'd rather not have his girlfriend see, it makes Marinette determined to make him realize she doesn't care about his insecurities so long as he's himself.Written for Day 7: Disguise for Marichat May.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Series: Marichat May 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1726804
Comments: 6
Kudos: 217





	you can be all of you when you're with me (and i'll do the same when i'm with you)

**Author's Note:**

> There are so many fics out there with Ladybug feeling insecure about her civilian self, but not too many with Chat Noir. So that's how this fic came to be :)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Marinette wasn’t exactly sure when she’d started doubting their relationship. Maybe it had been after that particularly nasty akuma a few weeks ago. Maybe it had been when Chat had admitted he knew her outside of the mask. Or perhaps it had been when she’d talked to him as Ladybug, where he’d said that there were parts of him he’d rather not have his girlfriend see.

Whatever it had been, all Marinette knew was that now, whenever Chat came by, all she could think about was what he was hiding under his disguise. Who was he really under the mask? What was he so insecure about that he wouldn’t even let Marinette see?

They’d been dating for a couple of months now. The balcony visits had been going on for over a year, and over time, their friendship had blossomed into something more. Now Marinette couldn’t imagine life without Chat’s constant puns and inside jokes. Yes, they annoyed her to pieces when she was Ladybug--and they still did; the last thing she needed was another cat pun while they were saving Paris--but as Marinette, she found it in her to appreciate them. She’d always pushed her partner away when she was her alter ego for safety reasons, but as her civilian self, she could beckon him closer. And he’d come. Slowly but surely, he had. When things got tough, he was there for her, and vice versa. He made her laugh, smile, let out emotions she’d never thought possible. Feelings arose to the surface, ones she never thought she’d feel for anyone but Adrien. And when he finally admitted he felt the same way for her. . . . it hadn’t taken long for the two of them to figure everything out.

But recent events had her questioning her boyfriend. Marinette supposed this happened to every couple, and yet, she couldn’t help but feel more and more resentful that Chat was a superhero (even if she was one herself). He always had to hold back for fear of her figuring out who he was. She’d assumed that by holding back, he meant simple things like his real name and where he lived. But no. If she were to go by the conversation she’d had with him a couple of days earlier as Ladybug, that wasn’t the case.

_ “What’d you mean, there are parts of you that you don’t want her to see?” Ladybug asked, surprised. The two of them were sitting on the Eiffel Tower after patrol. _

_ Chat let out a sigh and stared out into the distance. “It’s complicated,” he said. “If I could. . . . if I had the courage, I would’ve asked her out as my civilian self.” _

_ “What’s so bad about your civilian self?” Ladybug whispered. “What’s so bad that she can’t see?” _

_ Chat bit his lip. “I don’t think she’d want to date me if she knew who I was outside the mask,” he muttered. _

_ Ladybug desperately wanted to ask him  _ why _ , but she knew Chat wouldn’t tell her even if she asked. So she instead patted his shoulder reassuringly. “You should be honest with her, Chat. If she doesn’t like you even after whatever it is about your civilian self, then she doesn’t deserve you.” _

_ He smiled at her. “Does this mean we get to reveal our identities, Ladybug?” he asked with a slight tease in his voice. _

_ “Of course not,” she said with full force, knowing perfectly well that he was joking. They’d gone through these lines of dialogue way too many times. They both knew the answer. “You know how dangerous it is with Hawk Moth still around.” _

_ “I know,” Chat said, “but I think. . . . I think I like the anonymity I have when I’m around her. I can be myself in a way that I can’t be as my civilian self.” _

_ “Oh? And what’s that?” _

_ “That involves secret identities,” Chat said with a wink. Ladybug let out a small laugh, and the night continued on a lighter note. _

_ And yet, Ladybug hadn’t forgotten what he’d said earlier on in the conversation. _

That night, the two of them had continued to joke around with one another until Ladybug excused herself. They’d gone their separate ways, and when Marinette saw Chat at her balcony later in the night, the new profound knowledge had made a difference in the way she regarded her boyfriend. She tried to ignore it, and yet. . . . their interaction hadn’t been the same. He was keeping something from her, and she was determined to figure out what was wrong.

(Somewhere in the back of her mind, the sensible part of Marinette pointed out that she was being a hypocrite. She brushed the thought aside. There was a reason their identities were kept a secret; they didn’t need to get into  _ that _ complicated mess yet.)

“Hey Chat?” Marinette murmured. It had been several days since the conversation she’d had with him as Ladybug. The two of them were cuddled up on her chaise, Chat’s head in her lap as she gently stroked her hair.

He looked up at her lazily. “Yeah, princess?”

Marinette had contemplated asking him this for a while, but ultimately decided it was the best thing to do. She wanted to know more about him. She wanted to know more about his civilian self, all the flaws, all the insecurities; because she didn’t  _ care _ if they made him seem any less perfect. Gosh, she didn’t even want him to be perfect! She loved him, regardless of his flaws. Even if he wasn’t perfect, he was perfect for  _ her,  _ and that was all that mattered.

“What’re you like as your civilian self?”

Chat immediately tensed up. She could tell in the way that his body stiffened, in the way that the relaxed, content expression on his face vanished. “Why are you asking?”

Marinette shrugged. “I guess I’m just curious,” she said. “I mean, you know what I’m like, obviously, but I’ve been thinking, if you know me outside the mask. . . .” she trailed off when he looked at her with narrowed eyes.

“Is that the only reason you’re asking?” Chat was now sitting up so that he faced her. “You know I can’t reveal my identity to you, princess. It’s dangerous.”

“I know, minou,” Marinette said earnestly. “I’m not asking you to do that. I’m just curious about what you’re like with your friends, what you’re like in school--”

“I’m not really that significant as my civilian self,” he said, cutting her off. “I’m a lot shyer and not as  _ pawsome _ \--because really, who’s as  _ meowzing _ as Chat Noir?--but other than that I’m not too different.”

Marinette wasn’t convinced. “Oh I don’t know, kitty” she said with a teasing glint in her eyes, “if  _ I _ were a superhero, I would definitely be a lot different than I am now.”

Chat raised his eyebrows. “How so?”

She leaned back and crossed her arms behind her head, putting her legs on his lap. “Well, for one, I would probably hate your puns.”

Chat pouted. “But princess! Why?”

“Because you need to be  _ serious _ when you’re a superhero,” Marinette said. “That’s probably why Ladybug gets annoyed whenever you joke around during a fight.”

“I do that to lighten the mood,” Chat said defensively. “And besides, Ladybug needs to loosen up a little. She’s too uptight for her own good.”

“Hmm, and then I guess I would also be a lot less clumsy than I am now,” she said. “Oh! And more confident.”

“I could see that,” Chat said, cocking his head. “Anything else?

Marinette took in a deep breath. “I would probably use my superhero identity as an outlet. To escape from normal, everyday life. To be more. . . . me. To hide my insecurities and my flaws.” She locked eyes with him. “To be someone everyone else will love for the right reasons.”

By now, it was clear to Chat that she wasn’t talking about herself anymore. He broke away from her gaze. “What are you trying to get at?” he whispered.

“Chat,” she said, swinging her legs off his lap and moving closer to him. She took his hands in hers. “I want to know you.  _ All _ of you,” she added before he could protest. “I know you’ve told me that Chat Noir is the part of you that you love more, but. . . . I  _ want _ to get to know that other part of you. Even if I’m not supposed to know your identity.”

There was silence between them for several seconds. Marinette started to worry about whether or not she pushed a boundary--after all, she and Chat had been dating for a while, but things could still go wrong--when he started to speak.

“You’re right,” he said quietly. “Being Chat Noir is like an outlet for me. I know you know that, but I guess I never let you know how much of an outlet this identity is to me.”

Marinette gave him a small nod to tell him to continue.

“My civilian self isn’t really me,” he whispered. “I mean, I have friends that I love and who always support me, but they can’t do much. There’s just. . . . so much pressure. I have a reputation to uphold. They don’t really understand that. A lot of that is what brings me to hold up a facade of the sort, I guess, in front of people. A lot of the time, I don’t get to be who I really am.”

Marinette opened her mouth to speak, but Chat gently pressed a finger to her lips, effectively cutting off whatever she’d wanted to say. He gave her a small smile.

“Being Chat Noir gives me that freedom,” he said. “And. . . . I guess I’m afraid that if you knew who I really was, you wouldn’t see past that side of who I am.”

She didn’t know what to say to that. Marinette frowned, thinking as the silence between them grew longer. Seeing her reaction, Chat slowly started to draw his hands away from hers, muttering something about needing to leave.

“You know,” Marinette said, tightening her grip on his hands, “you’re right. I don’t know if I would see past the facade you hold in your civilian life.  _ But, _ ” she continued, “there are other things I know about you. I know you’re funny. You’re kind, sweet, brave, and a huge dork. You’re the guy that makes me laugh when I’m sad, the guy that holds me when I’m sad, and you’re always there for me.”

_ You’re the guy that takes every hit for me during an akuma fight. You’re the one that would go to any length to make sure that I’m comforted and taken care of when I push myself too far. You’re the guy that shoulders every burden with me, whether or not I ask you to. _

“And I love you for that, Chat,” Marinette murmured, so quietly it was only because of his enhanced hearing that he could pick it up. “I don’t care who you are in your civilian life. You’re  _ you _ , with all of your flaws. That’s all that matters.”

He stared at her with wide eyes. He blinked rapidly, as if fighting back tears. It was the first time he’d ever say the words out loud. “I—”

This time it was Marinette that put a finger to his lips. She smiled. “And before you say anything,” she said, “if I can’t see past whatever facade you hold up as civilian you, feel free to smack me on the head for not noticing earlier.”

But there was no need for that. Because despite the fact that Chat was quite reserved outside of his disguise as a superhero, Marinette was one of the few people that made Adrien feel like himself. He’d been worried that getting close to her as his civilian self would hurt their friendship (which is why he’d ended up seeking her company as Chat), but he now realized. . . . it wouldn’t have mattered. Marinette has always understood him. If anything, he wanted to smack  _ himself _ for not realizing.

The fact just made him want to cry. She cared about him so,  _ so _ much. He couldn’t recall the last time he’d felt this loved.

“You’re the best, Mari,” Chat croaked, wrapping his arms around her. He buried his face against her shoulder.

“I love you,” she whispered, holding him close.

And of course, there was nothing else Chat could do but whisper those sacred words back.

“I love you too.”


End file.
